October 20, 2007

I’ve been home for 2 weeks now and gaining strength very slowly, but steadily. I’ve had a couple bouts with GvHD (I think). No one is sure but my stomach objected strongly to some new foods on both occasions. I’m still trying to figure out how to progress with food variety and not wake the sleeping giant.

Barbara and I are both trying to figure out what in life is next for us. God hasn’t laid out His plan distinctly to either of us so we are at a loss of how to plan. Since we want to be in God’s will, we are trying to be effective each day (in our limitations), yet be ready to yield to God’s direction. We are really trying to live one day at a time.

A good friend asked me if visualizing where I will be in the future helps to plan a strategy on how to get there. He was thinking as a runner who is training to run a marathon. Since the future is not mine to plan, what do I visualize?

Today when Barbara and I were reading together, a scripture helped me to express how I feel about this.

Proverbs 20:24 - A man’s steps are directed by the LORD,
How then can anyone understand his own way?

We actually have gotten out of the house a few times to places where we feel the germ count is not too great. We started feeling like we were under house arrest when my strength became such that I could get out of the car and walk a good distance with my walker. The walls of our family room were becoming far too familiar.

As my marrow has been rebuilding, the BCR-ABL level in my blood has been increasing ever so slightly. This blood protein is the barometer of how many leukemia cells are present. The doctor expected the level to rise slightly in the beginning as the marrow rebuilt until the donor cells became established enough to kill the leukemia cells. However, a rising BCR-ABL level can also mean the leukemia is coming back.

Last Wednesday I received the latest BCR-ABL level test results. The level was less than half of the previous test. The level reduction, along with the 2 bouts of GvHD, could easily mean that the donor cells are becoming active and strong and that they are combating the leukemia. We will have to wait until the next test report comes back to see any trend.

I am convinced that the lower BCR-ABL level is due to so many of you praying for God to be glorified by healing me of this disease. I have to admit that I was expecting the results to show a rise in the level again. My lack of faith was covered by your prayers. Thanks!!